I’m late to the party when it comes to watching the show Yellowstone, but I get why people love it. 

Beyond the cowboys and dramas, I’m hooked into the writing. The incredible monologues and the wisdom in some of the dialogue - particularly one scene with Beth (the wild farmer’s daughter) and her fight system.  

Beth is a fighter but that’s her safety strategy, not who she is, and her internal battle tells us that’s not who she wants to be, it’s who she believes she must be. 

And the Universe is a mirror, if she wants a fight, it will deliver one 

There’s a particular scene in one of the episodes where she is determined to overcome a past trauma and her relationship with horses. 

Living on a ranch it’s a good one to resolve. 

However, she approaches the situation from her conditioning, fight. 

She chooses to “attack” the issue head on, she’s going to control, endure and throw herself at the problem, in this case, a horse. 

And as a mirror, the horse fights her back, bucks her off, and lands her on her ass, alone in the dirt, broken and bruised. 

And, in true fighter form, she tries harder, more aggressively, hops back on and tries the same thing with the same result.  

Many of us can relate to this and swap out the horse for our relationships with others and our unique safety strategies of fight, flight, freeze, fawn (people pleasing)  

Doing the same thing only to be bucked off, stonewalled, feeling helpless or taken advantage of – all of it leaving us lying in the dirt blaming everyone and everything around us. 

It’s exhausting

To others witnessing, we seem insane repeating patterns that clearly aren’t working. 

But I have a lot of compassion for Beth – and am so very grateful that IFS and DBR gave me the ability to sit in stillness, in the dirt, in my feelings of heartbreak and frustration and wait until a higher wisdom moves me to do something different, not my conditioned impulses. 

And should the wisdom not come from my inner stillness, I now know to wait until the Universe shows me a better way, sends a sign, a messenger. 

Enter, Walker, one of the wranglers on the ranch –a messenger in human form 

He says to Beth, “that horse can feel a fly landing on his back. If you’re thinking it, he’s feeling it” and goes on to explain that the horse can feel the fight in her, so it braces, gets ready to fight her back. 

This is how life works - how other people, places and circumstances magnify and mirror everything we feel, especially when we don’t know we’re feeling it.   

Every thought and every emotion is mirrored back to us – showing us the consciousness we’re operating from, the energy we’re creating from.

If our energy is closed, guarded, avoidant we will be met in relationships that feel hollow, pressured, overwhelming and in the end, isolating  

If our energy is needy, desperate and we betray our own needs, we will be met in relationships that take advantage of us, don’t prioritize our well-being and don’t reflect our inherent worth. 

And if we have fight energy, well, I’ll let you watch Yellowstone to see how that works out for Beth. 

And we need to remember that the Universe is not a psychopath – it’s not trying to destroy us.

It’s trying to show us our patterns, our choices and old beliefs about how we think we need to show up in the world to survive.   

So, let’s use the good folks in Yellowstone as a reminder to spend less time automatically reacting to life from old safety strategies that leave us in the dirt, and start practicing stillness and being open to messenger’s offering guidance and support 

Talk soon

Natasha